Finally a post not written under the influence of red bull
Hello everyone out there in the land of the internets. I haven’t written anything in…well since we came to Broome. So I thought it was high time that I caught you up on the details without the crazy rhyming and lack of punctuation that other authors on this site seem to favor. So. here it is: Life In Broome According To Rose.
We have been out of the tenting land and into the “flat” -otherwise known as the one room trailer with no toilet (it is in the main house)- for about a month now. Honestly it really just proves how awful human beings are, when we were in the small tent it was all “oh if only there was more space all would be perfect.” So we got a bigger (alot bigger) tent and that was great for about 3 days and then it was; ”Oh if only there was a permentent source of electricity, and we had a door so we didn’t have to keep zipping and unzipping this tent then life would be rainbows and sunshine.” So Voila I in my magician like ways materialise a trailer -I mean a flat. (the voila is also known as whinging wildly to everyone you work with until they give you accomadation for next to nothing.) And we are both wildly happy. I mean A fridge, and a bed and a TV and electricity and everything!
But you see now it’s a little different. because the house is too small for 2 people. Maybe for those brady-bunch easy peasy people but for one reasonable sensible adult (me) and for a crazy person (Sam) it’s SMALL. So now I am on the lookout for something a little bigger; a small mansion prehapse, a nice and tidy 5 bedroom that they seem to breed around here. I have no idea if they have 5 bedrooms for extra backpackers that are lying around the place or if people procreate more up here. Its one to ponder.
The kimberley sightseeing centre (otherwise known as work) is not too bad- thats where I am now, eating chicos and being jolly important. I have only been here a couple of months but it is often easier to pretend (otherwise know as lying) that I have always lived in Broome, and that I know everything about the place, this has only backfired a few times and on the whole is a useful stratagy and I think that the tourists appriciate it.
The most distressing thing about Broome is that everyone I meet that I feel is a kindred spirit and I think “excellent I’ll have you!” Tells me the next second that they are leaving Broome- all awsome people (apart from Sam and Myself) leave Broome. All of them.
But sometimes awsomer ones come to visit- and (with that beautiful seague) one of those is my Mum! She will be arriving this evening and I am so Excited and I just can’t Hide it!
Also sam has some ne-ews so stay tuned.
And now to leave you with some punctuation
.,;’!
x
Yay!! We have a message from Rose, very well written, love the punctuation!!
:)
Pfft. You call THAT a good example of punctuation and grammarism?
As they say in Pulp Fiction: “Well allow me to retort!”
“Hello everyone out there in the land of the internets.”
Crit: It’s an internetism WITH punctuation. “internets” is always followed with the eleventy-one. Eg. internets!!!111!
“crazy rhyming and lack of punctuation that other authors on this site seem to favor. So. here it is: Life In Broome According To Rose.”
Crit: Try “favour” you yankie baby-killer. You’re supposed to be half English and you were cut from a (albeit lovely) European, so learn the lingo scones and cup-o-tea. Ooh, and “So. here it is:” Your so called sentence structures consist of a single word, then followed with a lower-case. Flip off the crazy switch will ya Hot-Gams?
“So we got a bigger (alot bigger)”
Crit: Alot? as in, an allotment? Do you mean “a lot bigger”? It’s ok. Just don’t try to converse with anyone from Vietnam a year from now.
“permentent source of electricity”
Crit: Permantent? Is that some kind of really well man-erected tent? Or did you mean permanent?
“they give you accomadation for next to nothing”
Crit: Accomadation? Your schooling was obviously under the same payment plan. Try accommodation.
“different. because”
Crit: “without the crazy rhyming and lack of punctuation that other authors on this site seem to favor”
“one reasonable sensible adult (me) and for a crazy person (Sam)”
Crit: Reasonable people don’t freak out when touched with alchol based waterless hand cleaner, claiming it “soaks into the skin and takes the bacteria and dirt with it, being sucked directly into your bloodstream” and feel funny after they lick a tattoo, claiming the ink came off on her tongue and is now working its way into their bloodstream”…
I’m just saying.
“a small mansion prehapse”
Crit: prehapse. Si Amiga. Si.
“The kimberley sightseeing centre (otherwise known as work) is not too bad- thats where I am now, eating chicos and being jolly important.”
Crit: None, lol. That’s fucking gold.
“I think that the tourists appriciate it.”
Crit: Lucky they don’t have you writing too many emails to these ‘appriciative’ tourists. Or should I say, tirists?
“and (with that beautiful seague)”
Crit: Did you mean segue? Stephen Seague in… “Rose gets PWNED!!!111″
I’m just saying… If you’re going to go rise up against me, make sure you’re nose is mighty clean otherwise I’m gunna wipe it for you. Good to see you’re posting though Rosie. Keep it up. And don’t quit your jolly important position at your day job.
- Sam
Ooh, and for the record. I skulled a “V” before writing that. The bottles, not the can. No Redbull in sight.
Chillax, Sambilly. You know those things are bad for you and your week (lol) constitution. Sugar OR caffeine. Say it with me. OR. That’s a logical OR, not a binary OR.
Hi Rose!!! o/
~V
Oops, for some reason I was clowning around.
~ Teh Vagrant Formerly Known As Bobo
Just disappointed you missed a typo Sammy…..
awsome…..awesome….
and on that point awesomer????….more awesome…..
Ha! call yourself the son of a journo????? ;-)
x your adoring sister
ps Though your rant reminds me of someone……
Lol. I haven’t heard a decent rant like that in ages.